Be Joe

There are certain days in my life that stand out strong in my memory. One of these days is the first time I saw Joe Versus the Volcano. This Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan classic is one of my family's all time favorites. It is inspirational in ways that few other movies or books are. It's not sad, sappy, or cruel. It has so many quotable lines that we often find ourselves saying lines from this movie and randomly singing lines from some of the songs. Joe's circumstances show us how any ordinary person can pick up their life and become the best that they can be (much like Do Life Right's mission statement). All anyone has to do is decide to have the life they want. Everything we ever need and want is available to us, we just have to believe it and grab it.

If you want to be reminded to WAKE UP and LIVE NOW, Joe Versus the Volcano is the movie for you. Whenever we're feeling like life is rough, or otherwise needing inspiration, we pull out this movie and become Joe for a while.

Wonder Falling

Ever notice the intense wonder in a young child's eyes? Wonder why the older children and adults you meet don't have it any more? I've spent a lot of time wondering about this very thing. When my first daughter was a baby, I wanted her to keep this sense of pure amazement as long as possible. I didn't ever want her to lose it. I loved that wide-eyed look of pure joy in her eyes. I wanted it, too.

My kids still have this wonderment and I'm gaining it again -- more and more every day. The conscious decision to not let it disappear has helped stop me in my tracks every time I've almost taken some of it away from my children.

I believe, and it has been shown to me many times, that well meaning parents and teachers are to blame for knocking this wonderment about life out of their children. Every time a parent or teacher teaches a child a "life lesson", sparkles of joy leave that person -- usually for ever. These "life lessons" are almost unequivocally never taught to people in any other way. What I mean by this is that these lessons aren't real life and in real life, they aren't found. If, perchance, they are -- the person living it will certainly learn the "lesson" very quickly. It need not have ever been taught. I'm not telling you this to make you feel guilty for your past behavior. I'm saying this in order to give you hope that all happiness can be regained if you desire it to be!

I love this quote from Radical Parenting:
"Most of the psychotherapy I have done with people has been to help them get over the damage they suffered from parents/teachers preparing them for life."

It is our obligation to the future generations of this world to be the very best parents we can be. Who cares how you were raised! You still have it in you to be an excellent parent. I believe everyone does. Don't blame the people that raised you for your own failings. Decide to change them now and make a commitment to not pass them to your children. Spankings and put-downs are not hereditary. You have the power to not perpetuate poor parenting.

As an Unschooling Mom, I vowed to never stop appreciating the wonder in my children's eyes. I see it in them every day. Yes, EVERY day. They've given me my spark back -- it is the best gift ever. Sometimes I feel as though I am walking around in a wonderful daze of pure joy. This world is astounding, interesting, and superbly amazing. When was the last time you felt that way? It isn't too late. Try playing with a young child -- on their level -- for a few hours. It is inspiring to become fascinated with every little thing in your surroundings again. Getting lost in the wonder of it all, whilst sharing the time with a child, is one of life's greatest pleasures. Look closely at things. Even the dirt on your floor is pretty interesting up close and personal. Pretend, if you have to, that you've never seen that exact thing ever before. Notice the beauty of it. It doesn't have to be a thing of nature, it could be a plastic toy or a bite of food.

Find your WONDER! Enjoy its peace.

Zen Gardening

Here is my family's ~30' labyrinth. We built this for meditating, relaxing, walking (exercise), and for just plain enjoyment. I've always wanted a rock labyrinth. Sometimes we walk as a family, sometimes individually. I believe that everyone needs their own little space (inside or outside) to help allow for a zen filled existence. Whether yours is a garden, a meditation area, or a labyrinth like ours, I hope you get a little corner of the world that is all yours.

Have a Vision: Vision Boards and Vision Boxes

Vision Boards and Vision Boxes are becoming very popular! They are similar to Wish Lists, yet significantly deeper. Vision Boards can encompass not only our material desires, but also our deepest and innermost wishes and dreams such as "more peace" or "a magical existence". With The Law of Attraction and "The Secret" so popular, we're learning that our thoughts and dreams really can come true! We just have to really want them.

My daughters and I have vision boards. We made ours out of cut peg board. We glued cork on different areas of the boards (different for each of us), strung wire on the back, and stained little wooden boxes that we later glued on the boards. We use the cork area for the material things and/or short term events we want (ours are evolving with us). The other area we've mod-podged things that make us feel good -- pictures of things, words, etc. that reflect who we are and who we want to be (I've put lots of calm, zen images on my board; my oldest daughter has lots of magical images; my youngest daughter has gemstones and ballet photos). Basically, we put things on our boards that we want to manifest into our lives. My youngest daughter cleverly hooked a cup onto her board that she fills with little homemade clay items.

Some people choose to make Vision Binders or Boxes where they put photos and magazine words/pictures/items into. We prefer our Boards that hang on the wall, so we can look at them throughout the day. The boards definitely lack the portability of a binder though. I've seen a variety of Vision Boards made out of cardboard, foam board, and other materials. The great thing about these is that there is no set way of making them. It is entirely up to you! Christine Kane wrote a really great "How to Make a Vision Board" blog entry for those interested. Some people even make computer wallpaper Vision Boards for their screen's background. This is a very neat concept!

We enjoy our Vision Boards so much that we held a "Vision Board Day" with our Girl Scout Troop (I'm a Girl Scout Leader for both of my daughters' troops). I've been amazed at the wonderful and creative ideas the girls have had! This also gave us a chance to share our collection of catalogs and magazines. Some of the girls put only words all over their boards, others chose only pictures. One thing is for certain: our boards have to evolve since we keep getting everything we hope and dream for! It is amazing how these things keep appearing in our lives.

With the Holiday Season just around the corner, I'm excited to see the items that are popping up on my daughters' Vision Boards. I know what they'll love to receive and I don't have to ask them.

Don't forget to periodically take photos of your Vision Boards. It is fun to look back over time and see how your dreams have come true!

"Where Should I Live?" Find Your Best Spot

I've been asked this question several times now, so here is my answer.

I believe that everyone should live in the place where they thrive the most. This physical place will absolutely not be the same for everyone, nor do we want it to be! That would just cause horrible overcrowding issues. However, if your surroundings are causing you pain (physical, mental, or emotional), then it is time for change. Maybe you only need a small rearranging of your living room. Maybe you need to move to the other side of the planet.

Yes, I am enamored with where I live. My family and I have determined that where we live is the only place on Earth where we want to be. We look out our windows and feel ultimate contentment. We strive every single day to keep our level of contentment the same or better. It has taken a lot of time and questioning for us to get where we are and we still don't have our dream home, but we are working on that aspect also.

Do not be afraid of change. Your own personal "best place" might change over time. This does not mean that you were wrong before; it means that your needs have changed as you and your lifestyle change. Your "best place" might be a combination of places (e.g. Alaska in the summer and Florida in the winter). Perhaps you thrive best as a traveler. I'm always amazed at the people that love that lifestyle. It must be exciting. I, however, need roots to feel content. There is no correct answer on where your "best place" is. However, it is a huge mistake to not listen to yourself when you know that you are in a bad place.

If you aren't 100% happy with where you live, try spending as much time as possible checking out alternate locations.

Ask yourself these questions (and more!):

• Why do I live where I live?


• What brought me to this location?


• Do my surroundings give me pleasure and happiness?


• Does the weather where I live make me happy or bring me down?


• Do I need a lot of sunlight, or is snow skiing what gives my life passion?


• Do I spend more time dreaming of faraway places than I spend enjoying my present surroundings?


• Am I happy with where I am? (You might find that you are, even if at first you don't think you are! Maybe there is no better place for you than your current town.)


• Do I want to live off-grid or on-grid or with a grid-tie system?


• Do I need a large area for gardening? Small area for gardening? Or, does gardening not matter to me at all?


• Do I hate lawn care? What about shoveling snow?

Do you feel trapped in your town, in your life and want to move, but you don't know where to go or even how to determine where to go? If you don't have the time or the funds for traveling around the world, try checking out the following sites. I've found their questions worth thinking about in helping my family determine where our own personal "best spot" is.

Find Your Spot
Sperling's Best Places

Once you have determined the location of your "best spot", put up photos around your home to help you bring it into your life. Don't have photos? Check out that area's tourist sites. Order free newcomer packets. Check out real estate companies in that area. Print photos of what you want your life to look like. We've found that vision boards work nicely for helping us manifest our desires into our lives.

Above all, make the best of where you are. Live as if your dreams have already come true. After all, you are where you are today. Work on getting to your dream location while enjoying the best that your current location has to offer. Where you are right now is someone's dream location. Enjoy this day!

Making Your House the Home You've Always Wanted

As we spent time piecing together what our perfect living environment was, we realized that we needed to think more organically. Our needs have changed over and over again through the years as we went from a young married couple, to a family with a baby, a family with a young child and a newborn, and now a family with a young child and a middle aged child. As our children grow and as our own personal interests wax and wane, our environment needs to grow and reflect that. We have needed to build flexibility into our spaces, so that every time our needs change we don't need to spend a lot of money to remodel. We aren't the only Unschooling family to live in this way. For us, part of the change has been to design a whole new house around the way we live. Clearly, this isn't the answer for most people (and we aren't there yet as the designed house isn't built yet).

What can you do if you want to move, but you cannot?

Make your house fit your family's personality! Don't be afraid to rearrange the rooms in your house to fit your family's lifestyle better. Who says that you need to have a table in the dining area? Maybe that space works better as a Lego room. Take an honest look at what you and your family actually do with their time. Devote the largest and most convenient rooms of your house to those activities. Do you work from home? Maybe your living room should be your office. Are you training for an ultramarathon? Put your exercise equipment front and center. There is no rule saying that people need to sleep in the designated bedrooms, either. Do what works best for your individual needs. Try room dividers. Add shelving everywhere that you can make it fit. You are the ones that live in your house, not anyone else.

Here are a few books that helped my family make our house work more efficiently for us. I have a more extensive list in my aStore under the "Do Living Right" category.

Move Your Stuff, Change Your Life: How to Use Feng Shui to Get Love, Money, Respect, and Happiness
Karen Rauch Carter

Feng Shui for the Rest of Us
Gabrielle Alizay

The Bathroom Idea Book
Andrew Wormer

The Kitchen Idea Book
Joanne Bouknight

Taunton's Home Storage Idea Book
Joanne Bouknight

Built-In Furniture
Jim Tolpin

Taunton's Home Storage Idea Book
Joanne Bouknight

Taunton's Home Workspace Idea Book
Neal Zimmerman

The Organizing Sourcebook
Kathy Waddill

Pretend You're on Vacation

As an Unschooling family, one of the greatest pleasures we get is from pretending we are tourists in our own area. A few times a month, we pack a lunch or supper (and the camera) and get in our pretend rental car (otherwise known as our car) and head off on a new and exciting adventure for a few hours.

Eight years ago, right before a cross-country move, we discovered that there were at least a dozen places in our area that we'd always wanted to go and see, but had never found the time to go to. With the looming moving date, we were forced to go and see those places right away or never see them (to this day I'm disappointed that I never went on the gummy bear factory tour). While we did go see most of those local tourist attractions, we vowed to never miss out on happenings and places in our new locale.

Mostly, we've held to this. However, over the past eight year period we: had another baby, moved five times, and spent our time learning a gob of stuff. Basically, life started getting in the way again. Our early outings aren't remembered by either of our children, so we've decided to start being guests in our own area again. After a summer vacation, we grabbed local magazines and brochures from the airport. We've been scouring them, slowly doing all the things we haven't done before and all the things we've been wanting to do again.

Have you been bored with your area lately? Check out businesses that give tours (I've been very surprised at how many places that normally don't give tours are more than willing to let interested people have a private tour). Check the national forests in your area. Still can't find anything interesting? Pop into a local hotel and pick up all the brochures (hand them out to your friends after you are done with them). Broaden your idea of "local" to anything within a day's drive there and back. Day trips are wonderful for making you feel like you really did get away from the daily grind. Put a list of all the places you want to go on your refrigerator or vision board. Don't feel like you have to do them all in one day; try one a month.

Just don't forget to take your camera!